It is undeniable that it is hard for women to be their natural selves simply because of the onslaught of expectations of who and what they are supposed to be...
In some regard it is easy to identify the fact that as men, we are brought up to sexualise breasts. The harder question to explore is why.
The various images women are expected to live up to are not just shaping the psyche, self-worth, self-esteem and social behaviours but also the body as they directly effect posture, movement and even the physical and physiological development from girl to woman...
It is undeniable that it is hard for women to be their natural selves simply because of the onslaught of expectations of who and what they are supposed to be to meet the needs and pictures society has created and accepted as the norm. From young they are wedged into the image of being a pretty girl, becoming a good mother, sex bomb, super model, care taker, hardworking career woman, multi-tasking family and daily chores manager.
This constant trying to measure up to impossible ideals and the ‘roles’ women are expected to play, is not just shaping the psyche, self-worth, self-esteem and social behaviours of women but also the body as the way a woman feels about herself directly effects posture, movement and even the physical and physiological development from girl to woman. The burden which is placed on women to be multiple roles, all for others at the great expense of self, is no doubt linked to the lack of health and well-being that we are witnessing in women today. If a woman grows up trying to be perfect in every way, for everybody and their different expectations of her, then is it any surprise when later on health and well-being issues arise as seen in numerous quite common ailments such as eating disorders, menstrual discomfort, cysts, fibroids, lumps in the breasts, cancer and more.
As a health practitioner, osteopath and health counsellor I get to meet many women who suffer the above mentioned physical and or emotional conditions. Sometimes they are already diagnosed and supported by medicine, or often they are not even aware of the extent of their disharmonious disposition as a woman, due to the accepted norm and statistics that make us oblivious to the unnaturalness of these conditions.
Medicine does a great deal, and is in fact miraculous in many ways, in taking care of the medical side of things and helps much with managing the physical consequences, but there is not much real healing support for the underlying issues that are carried in the body and the way a woman feels about herself. From what I have seen in my 22 years of practice as an Osteopath, these harming imprints are stored not randomly but in precisely the places and organs that relate to the specificity of the issue. Thus we find particular issues reflected in specific organs like for example the breasts.
And no different to any other specialised medical or psychological treatment, this is where the Esoteric Breast Massage comes into play providing the deep understanding, loving care and female to female, professional and nurturing touch that is required to help the woman releasing the unresolved imprints from the body and psyche, and return to a knowing of her innate value and worth.
I have seen many women restore their sense of being who they are as a woman with the support of the EBM modality, a process of collaboration of two women who share and explore the inherent preciousness, power and sacredness that is the natural beingness of every woman equally. As an Osteopath I have observed in women who have had EBMs, shifts and changes of attitude, behaviour, and self-esteem. I have also seen a deepening of their relationship with self and others, an increase of self-appreciation and sense of empowerment as well as improvements of the physiology of the body back to a more harmonious function as seen in the quality of posture and movement, verbal expression, menstrual cycle, weight, endocrine balance and more. It is no secret that the choices we make affect our health and well-being, and supporting a woman to re-connect to her innate qualities is in my view going to very naturally give rise to health benefits.
Although medicine or psychology may not yet understand how such changes can occur through the support of a modality such as the EBM, it is nonetheless evident in the women who not only report their personal experience, but also show it through the tangible improvements of the physical body. Such anecdotal evidence is, indeed, worthy of being studied.
Traditionally a ‘woman with balls’ appears formidable, with a toughness that is considered a requirement of success, but it was when I met women that carried a radiance and power from within, that my world began to crumble in the best possible way...
In some regard it is easy to identify the fact that as men, we are brought up to sexualise breasts. The harder question to explore is why. Why is it that it is okay for boys to be encouraged to sneak a peek, grab a feel and to look at breasts as if they are somehow disconnected from the person, the woman that they are connected to?
Why is it that it is okay for men to ogle at magazines that show buxom women dressed in a way that make their breasts the sole focus with little regard for the person inside? Why is that you see men, sneaking a peak, either subtly while a women is not looking, or overtly unable to make eye contact with them as they speak?
As man that has grown up with these conditions, I am keen to explore why I might have been so willing to play that game, and why I have stopped. The reality is that I am not sure I would have stopped had I not seen that there was a difference between women who claim their power by being as tough as men, and women who show a level of power that has equal measure strength, fragility and a beauty that radiates from within.
Traditionally a ‘woman with balls’ appears formidable, with a toughness that is considered a requirement of success, but it was when I met women that carried a radiance and power from within, that my world began to crumble in the best possible way.
They were inspiring because that strength and beauty is wonderful to be around. It was also confronting because my conditioning told me that strength and tenderness are mutually exclusive, and that while beauty is nice to have, it is of little use in the cut and thrust of life.
My wife has been the recipient of regular Esoteric Breast Massage, as have a number of her friends. While I have little knowledge of the actual technique, what this modality awakened in the women in my life and then in me, was nothing short of amazing.
Being around my wife, as well as her friends, I got to feel that the sexualising of breasts, is a way of men NOT wanting to connect to the true radiance and nurturing that a woman can bring, because if men did feel that, they would then have to connect to how much they crave that in their life.
So the easiest way to push away the feeling of what is missing is to contribute to a society that asks women to be equal by being more like men or by sexualising them.
Sexualising women keeps them feeling self-conscious, and that their value is only in their looks – their body the only measure of their worth.
This is an extreme picture I am painting but it is there in daily life. I would have never realised this, unless these women in my life chose to no longer play the games society asked them to play.
In my interactions with women who have had regular Esoteric Breast Massage, I have been consistently shown more of that inner beauty.
Without exception these women are showing the world that the beauty and strength they hold is equal to any man’s physical strength. And through seeing it in them, I have begun to recognise that men can be beautiful too, and that we also carry an inner beauty and strength that cannot be measured by bicep size.
EBM MODALITY / FURTHER READING
Men speak about the changes they have experienced in their partners after receiving Esoteric Breast Massages... I’m always very supportive of the EBM as I know it’s about her receiving a profound treatment that supports her and as such supports us all.... read more